Laos Part 3 (Vientiane and Vang Vieng)

On the way on the bus we stopped for a toilet break.  Jessica went out for a wee in the woods and came back rather traumatised.  She had accidentally stepped in pooh and now had it all over her trousers.  We imagined she was covered in it.  Yet it turned out it was not too bad.  It did smell though.  Being fastidious about cleanliness she was mortified for the remainder of the bus ride.  Meanwhile to Cannelle and I, it was extremely funny.  We arrived in Vientiane and as we were on a local bus a large jumbo came to take us to the other bus station (we did not know this at the time.  Some Spanish guys informed us that there is a jumbo between the two main bus stations which is very cheap and saves a tuk tuk ride).  It was going to be a local one, but after they saw foreigners, they decided to not allow the locals on and kindly rent it to us for a ridiculous price.  Fuck I hate Laos people sometimes.  We didn't want their overpriced jumbo.  We walked out and about until we eventually took a tuk tuk for 10,000 each.  I think we may have been able to get 5,000 (though not inside the bus station), except we really had to get to the Vietnam embassy to get our visa as it was friday and the weekend was coming.  We arrived and got changed outside.  We had heard that they were super fussy about looking presentable, so we left Jessica outside with the bags and figured we would go in one by one.  It was much easier than we had expected and we had our visas in 15 minutes once we had paid for the express service. One guy saw our bags outside and laughed.  It seems its not that bad.  Just don't show up looking like a tramp.  It was good to be back in a city again, even if Vientiane is not really that much of a city.  We grabbed some pizza and got some sleep.

In the morning we were up and did a tour of the city.  This takes around 2 hours maximum, regardless of what Lonely Planey says.  Its a very pretty little city though.  Everyone had told us it was shit, but its better than they say.  We really liked it.  We walked past the palace and some of the old streets.  We went down to the river (which reminded us of like Barcelona waterfront at night) and to the mini arc de triomf, which we of course climbed.  After we grabbed breakfast and met a Belgian guy who was also travelling.  We had found the French cultural centre the day before and decided to go and watch the double bill for free.  We watched Le Noms de Gens and another film about two young Moroccan girls living in Puteaux.  The second one (which was actually first) was entertaining but difficult for me without the subtitles.  Le Noms de Gens is a really good film and is constantly innovative and going in directions you don't quite expect.  It was fun to be back in the cinema again as Laos does not actually have any cinemas.  We bumped into the Spanish guys who we had met in Hsipaw when we were hiking.  Very random.  They told us the North was really cool and that the people there apparently didn't lie at all.  We headed to a really nice French restaurant for dinner.  We could even find haribo etc, so we were far from being on budget in this city.  We can never stay on budget in cities as our impulse to spend on the finer things always takes over.  I had steak and the others had various dishes.  Really good again.  We decided to go bowling, but they wouldn't let us in without socks and stupidly we didn't have any and I was not going to pay to rent socks when I had some back at the hostel.  We decided to play pool next to our hostel.  I won almost every game against everyone as it was finally on American pool tables and a style I was used to.  There were a few dickhead English guys, but they seem to get everywhere.

We did nothing in the morning.  Just relaxed.  There really isn't enough to do in Laos.  Its the biggest problem.  Lots of half days, but not many packed days.  We grabbed breakfast (croissants and pain au chocolats as you can get anything French here) and then had to sit down with some dickhead French guys and a lazy bum, who had taken 3 days to get his visa for Vietnam, left it till saturday and had to spend a week in Vientiane.  Moron.  We booked a minibus from our hotel to Vang Vieng as it was surprisingly cheaper.  They put on the evil air con again.  I hate minivans.  They ram you in like battery chicken and then freeze you to death in case you go off on the way to your destination.  I felt like cargo chicken.  I opened the window to remove the aircon, but they forced me to freeze myself.  They dropped us off at a hotel.  Ah...here was why it was cheap.  Never mind.  They offered us a room for 100,000.  How generous.  Looked like a nice place, but our budget was 40,000 - 50,000.  We said no and they offered everyone a tuk tuk ride to town.  I said it was less than 1km which ruined their plans for money and we set off walking.  Their cheap bus would not pay dividends this time as the other tourists followed us as well.  Then they walked 20m and decided that was too much effort (it is a long way) and took the tuk tuk.  We walked into town and got a really nice room for 50,000.  As someone said you can't see the river.  I said that I am sure I would be able to see the river from the riverbank.  The place looks like a ghost town now.  Once famous for its raves, partying, drinks and drugs, it has all changed now.  I guess it was the fact that 22 people drowned on a very shallow river.  Whatever the reason, they had shut down all of the bars.  Its now back to where it was before all the boom in tourism I imagine.  Still have lots of buses of 'zombie tourists' (have to credit Peter with that great expression) arriving and asking questions like 'but there aren't any bars left?'  Of course because you fly all the way around the world to drink on a river.  Can do that at home.  We watched Spurs lose 2-1 to Manchester City and I had really believed we would hang on.  Oh well.

The morning began with a real disagreement and fight over what we would do as there was no night bus to Phonsavan.  That meant we only had one day here instead of two.  There were three things we wanted to do (tubing, visit the hotel with the cave pool and visit the blue lagoon by bicycle).  We wouldn't have time to do all of it.  New Orleans beat Atlanta as well to continue their recovery.  Seems like both my teams can't win at the same time.  In the end we opted to start with tubing after a fruitless walk to the bus station to check times.  Its 10,000 cheaper for a bus from there, but if you factor in the cost and/or time of getting there it may not be worth it.  We met some French people (Cannelle assures me they were annoying), an Italian guy (who was annoying) and a Spanish guy (who everyone liked but I didn't warm to).  They would be our tubing buddies.  The float down the river was quite nice, but not amazing.  We had come in the morning to avoid the zombie tourists.  You can see all the scars along the river bank where the bars used to be.  Now its just very peaceful.  The river is not that fast compared to Belize where I last tubed.  Without all the excietment of the bars I really don't think the place will continue to thrive.  There has been such a monumental building boom that there are now far too many bars and hotels for the tourists.  Every bar has around 5 people in it and apparently tourism is down 60%.  When people realise what has happened the town will be finished.  It is going to make the place very, very cheap.  Bad news for the locals, but great news for any tourists who had been put off visiting the place by its reputation.  The float down the river was nice and peaceful and Cannelle and I even found time to do some salsa on the tubes.  When we arrived in the town some little kids tried to grab the tubes, but we had heard this was a sure fire way to lose our deposit, so we clung on and took them back.  We had been stamped like a cattle branding before we had got on the tubes.  We grabbed a burger from the street vendors in town.  It was a really good street burger and all the ingredients were fresh.  I would highly recommend it as all the food we ate in restaurants ranged from mediocre to crap and was far too expensive.  Jessica decided to stay in town and Cannelle and I went off to Vang Vieng resort and the cave lagoon.  Its a pretty little walk and the place was full of Thai tourists.  They looked at our hands and saw the marks and laughed with their friends.  I made a 'moo' sound like cows and they laughed even more.  Its amazing the level of conversation and understanding you can have with someone, even when you don't speak the same language.  The cave is rubbish, but the little pool is really nice.  Its a very relaxing place.  You can swim into the cave, even though the water was really cold.  After we decided to walk to the blue lagoon, because it was only 6km or so and there seemed no need for a bicycle.  If you like walking I would highly recommend this option as the road is very bumpy and not very pleasant for cycling.  We walked all the way there in less than an hour and a half.  Some locals were like 'you walking, very good.'  Some tourists even took photos of us because we walked.  The annoying Italian guy had said it was impossible to walk.  Yes, totally impossible.  Idiot.  We played with some puppies en route, who were impossibly cute.  The walk there is really pretty.  The blue lagoon less so.  It was honestly a bit of a disappointment.  The cave at the top of the slippery climb was better than the lagoon.  If you are torn between here and the resort, go to the resort.  We had been told the resort was better by Savine.  When we got there we thought it can't be.  When we got to the lagoon we realised it was.  The water was freezing cold as well, so even swimming is not that pleasant. On the way back we saw lots of Hmong children begging and even one who was carrying her little brother, saw us and started to fake cry and beg for money.  Cannelle was a little sickened that she would fake it.  I am too cynical.  We got back just as the sunlight was fading and went to meet Jessica and the Spanish guy for dinner.  The annoying Italian (who turned out to be a London city boy.  No surprise) was also there.  So was a nice German couple and Peter (an American from Alaska who coined the zombie tourist phrase).  We ended up having a long discussion on politics and an even longer one on bears as Cannelle was surprised that bears were like dogs to him, having grown up around them with them being so common.  The German guy looked a lot like my old housemate James.  The Spanish guy told a lot of crap jokes, but the dinner was quite nice and we had some decent local Laos food. We suggested that Peter met us in Luang Prabang and travelled the north with us as he also wanted to visit the caves.

In the morning we got our ridiculous pick up to go to the bus station where everyone was just loaded on a jumbo and herded up there like cattle.  We saw Peter again as he was off to Luang Prabang.  Everyone got on their buses and there was one French moron who didn't realise he had gotten on the wrong bus even though everyone was saying for five minutes that someone was on the wrong one.  It was very cramped on our bus, but we were off to Phonsavan.